Best Sweater Ever

For those on your Christmas list who have everything, why not get them the coolest sweater on the history of this planet Earth? I'm referring of course to the country club chic animal sweater that T.I. wore this week on SNL. It's hysterical and sexy and any man that can pull off this look deserves props.

http://www.celebrityclothingline.com/celebrity-entrepreneurs/ti-in-akoo-on-snl/

Matt and Al Dancing

It's no secret that I love the "Today Show." Well the other day, Matt and Al did a rhythmic dancing routine that was quite endearing. I love the mix of serious stories and fluff on "Today." It really makes my mornings go smoothly.

The video had decent choreography and more importantly, it featured a cameo by a ribbon twirling Brian Williams around the 4:52 mark. Enjoy!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/26286602#26287132

Olympic athlete of the day

I was going to write a little ditty about Jonathan Horton and his fantastic, consistent performance yesterday but then I saw this:

http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2008/08/us-mens-gymnast.html

While I was not going to call him the stud of the day, I feel like this gives the man his props. It even applauds Justin Spring.

James Franco: It's Complicated

"GQ" is a magazine that I often dismiss as men's fashion fluff and a showcase for beefcake covers under the guise of class, but I must say sometimes they write amazing interviews. This current profile of James Franco is particularly fascinating as he is a complex man of many interests and extremely introspective. He's funny yet serious and very driven.

Here were 2 of my favorite bits from the article:

During the show’s run, three of the freaks—Franco, Seth Rogen, and Jason Segel—would meet at Segel’s house on Saturday mornings for extra, unofficial rehearsals. “I mean, they weren’t the most rigorous rehearsals,” says Franco. “For the most part we just liked hanging out.” In the end, he says, it was Rogen and Segel who became really good friends. At the time, Segel was dating Linda Cardellini, who was friends with Franco’s on-screen girlfriend, Busy Philipps, who had a problem with Franco. “And so I think Jason took her side and thought I was a jerk,” he says. “I’ll admit I was not a team player. A lot of it, I think, just had to do with being obnoxious when the camera was on someone else. Maybe I’d eat a banana in the background that would take focus away from other actors. I didn’t think about it that way, but now I could say, ‘Look, the scene’s not about me, it’s about them, just chill out, James. Don’t eat a fucking banana.’ ”


In the e-mail, Franco also expresses regret over the things we didn’t have a chance to discuss: “I felt like we didn’t talk about writing or art as much as I would have liked, as those are what take up most of my life now. But if we didn’t it’s because I closed those subjects because I was uncomfortable about this forum as a place to discuss those things. Who wants to hear an actor talk about books or art? No one. I just hope my interest in those areas, and my dedication to them, was apparent. But I know as an actor I’m not supposed to show interest in anything except charities and the environment. I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m supposed to show interest in. (By the way, we didn’t talk about the work I do with orphans, but that’s OK. Maybe the next article.)” He closes with the words “I am just rambling. Thanks.”

Here is the full article:
http://men.style.com/gq/features/landing?id=content_7397

Olympic Fever: Catch it!

I'm simply mad about the Olympics. It has consumed my life already and it's only day 3. It's even more thrilling than I remember. The opening ceremony was spectacular. The boxes as waves, characters, and flowers were pretty amazing and even moreso when it was revealed that it was controlled by people! The Chinese really know how to turn it out. Their emphasis on the collective really came in handy during the choreography for the opening ceremony.

This year, I find that I'm watching all the events. Usually I favor swimming, gymnastics, and the key track and field events, but now I'm watching synchronized diving and even volleyball as well (not just women's beach but also the less glamorous indoor team volleyball). Granted NBC is really stretching with some of their human interest stories this year (the French swimmer who fell in love with the Italian swimmer who now dates a competitive female Italian swimmer, Michael Phelps had ADHD, Natalie Coughlin loves to shop at Farmer's Markets). But for every story that sounds like a Facebook profile, there are some good ones (the 33 year old gymnast formerly of the Soviet Union who went to Germany because she need healthcare for her son who had leukemia). And last night's 4X100 freestyle relay was out of this world. I became so enraptured and excited that I almost screamed out loud. I could not believe the way Jason Lezak passed France at the end. It was an incredible nail biter! Although this almost didn't happen thanks to the lackluster efforts of Cullen Jones. Ugh, swim faster dude! Even Garrett Weber-Gale did better than you and he's a rookie.

Below are some more Olympic related musings and links.

Olympic Highlights:
http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/share.html?videoid=0808_HD_OC_RC_CE005

Michael Phelps: Hot or Not? This is actually a pressing topic. As many have noted, Michael Phelps has a hot body. That is an undisputed fact. However, the face leads to debate. Some think it's adorable goofy. Some think it's just goofy. Some hate the teeth. Some think he looks awkward out of the water. Well, cast your vote here and decide.
http://popsugar.com/1854039

My pick for "Most likely to replace Tom Dolan in my heart" award goes to:
Ryan Lochte (USA-swimming)
http://www.google.com/search?q=ryan+lochte&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a
http://ladiesdotdotdot.wordpress.com/2008/07/02/hump-day-hottie-ryan-lochte/
-He's attractive, laid back, a great swimmer, and is only 2 years younger than me. Granted he may not be as successful in attaining golds but he's on my radar.

My pick for least appealing Olympian goes to:

Bridget Sloan (USA-gymnastics)
-She stumbled on the floor exercise when all scores were going to count for the qualifier. She has eyes that clearly indicate she cannot handle pressure and has low self-esteem. For someone so "consistent" and "solid", I expected more.

Honorable mention for being punished for being young, attractive and famous by the Chinese government:
Guo Jingjing (China-synchronized diving)

Olympic rant:
I am annoyed at George W. Bush's presence at the games. He can claim it's to foster a peaceful relationship with China, but I think he just wants to hang out. And I would bet money he wasn't whispering with Putin on Friday about what was going on between Russia and Georgia but rather it was focused on "Hey, wow didja see those lights?" Bush - you suck worse than Edwards!

John Edwards=major disappointment

John Edwards you suck! When the news first broke on Friday (and oddly enough it broke for me while watching "Entertainment Tonight"), I was shocked. I had heard the rumors and the "National Enquirer" allegations of Edwards fathering a love child, but I dismissed them. After all, his love with Elizabeth was solid (They still go to Wendy's for their anniversary! He thinks she's sexy!) and the "National Enquirer" is a tabloid. But to hear him confess to infidelity after he's gone on and on about family values and while Elizabeth has incurable cancer is so unforgivable. His political career is toast. I don't understand why he confessed. No one was paying attention to this story but the tabloids. He could have ignored the story until perhaps it went away and who knows, he might have ended up with a cabinet position. But now that he's public with the affair, he's lost all his credibility and the respect of a lot of Americans.

It's a good thing the Olympic opening ceremony was the same day because otherwise I would have been so distraught I wouldn't have been able to snap out of my funk. In conclusion, John Edwards as a man: D and John Edwards work with poverty and universal healthcare: B+.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/08/08/edwards-admits-sexual-aff_n_117780.html

Will Kill for Fried Chicken

One of the Yahoo! news stories today involved a man who pleaded guilty to murder in exchange for fried chicken, calzones, and pizza. Apparently, this man was so sick of jail food that he was willing to go to prison with only a chance at parole after 30 years just for some outside food. As crazy as this story is, I'm more surprised at the fact that this man is from NYC which has an overabundance of quality, diverse cuisine and he sells himself out for KFC and Popeye's in Oregon. If I were going to make such a silly legal arrangement, I would at least negotiate for some foie gras, oysters, lobster, etc. - you know food that can't be found on a dollar menu. And I would insist that Chef Eric Ripert cook the food personally for me. And then have tea with me. And then whisper sweet nothings in my ear with his French accent.

I mean how bad was the food in prison? Even if it was Oliver Twist style gruel, as long as it didn't have pins in it, I wouldn't confess to murder over some bad food. Unless it was gruel with spam in it. That would prob make me confess. Maybe this criminal was listening to Nas's "Fried Chicken" song on a loop in jail and he felt the craving for "fried chicken, fly vixen, give me heart disease but I need you in my kitchen." Damn, that's a good song.

Here's the article on the criminal:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080807/ap_on_re_us/ice_cream_killer

Nas's "Fried Chicken":

http://www.amazon.com/Nas/dp/B001A5074S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1218117382&sr=1-1

Blueberry Boy Bait

For those of you who like old school, country style simple desserts, you are going to love this one. I first had it at my friend’s farm house in PA. When his mom said it was called “Blueberry Boy Bait”, my first reaction was “blueberry boy what?” But essentially, the story was that if you bake this blueberry cake, the boys will come running. Now, we live in modern times so I’m not sure if this is really as potent for boy baiting purposes as it once was in Amish country but it’s certainly a crowd pleaser. The cake is moist and rich and a cross between a coffee cake and a dessert cake. My friend’s mom said she didn’t understand how to email her recipe, so I used a recipe that I found off of cookscountry.com and then just tweaked it to my desires (more blueberries, coffee cake topping). I haven’t actually baked this with the coffee crumb topping (I stuck closely to the recipe the first time) but I’m assuming these proportions will work.

Blueberry Boy Bait

Serves 12 with small pieces

Cake
2	cups all-purpose flour plus 1 teaspoon
1	tablespoon baking powder
1	teaspoon table salt
16	tablespoons unsalted butter (2 sticks), softened
3/4	cup packed light brown sugar
1/2	cup granulated sugar
3	large eggs
1	cup whole milk
1/2	heaping cup blueberries , must be fresh
Topping
3/4	cup blueberries , must be fresh
1/4	cup granulated sugar
1/2	teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4	cup flour
1/3	cup butter

1. For the cake: Adjust oven rack to middle position and heat oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour 13 by 9-inch baking pan.

2. Whisk 2 cups flour, baking powder, and salt together in medium bowl. With electric mixer, beat butter and sugars on medium-high speed until fluffy, about 2 minutes. Add eggs, one at a time, beating until just incorporated. Reduce speed to medium and beat in one-third of flour mixture until incorporated; beat in half of milk. Beat in half of remaining flour mixture, then remaining milk, and finally remaining flour mixture. Toss blueberries with remaining 1 teaspoon flour. Using rubber spatula, gently fold in blueberries. Spread batter into prepared pan.

3. For the topping: Scatter blueberries over top of batter. Combine sugar, cinnamon, flour, and butter in a small bowl and blend with a fork until crumbly. Sprinkle crumb mixture over batter. Bake until toothpick inserted in center of cake comes out clean, 40 to 50 minutes (depending on your oven’s strength). Cool in pan 20-30 minutes, then cut and serve. Serve warm or at room temperature. (Cake can be stored in airtight container at room temperature up to 3 days.)

1-2-3-4...

Feist performed a version of her hit song 1234 on "Sesame Street" and it's pretty darn adorable. And the song works very well from a kid's educational perspective even though the counting stalls at 4 and children should really be aware of all the numbers that come after 4.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZ9WiuJPnNA

Olympic Fever

So the Olympics are coming up and I was struck by one thought - the thought that pops into my head every year since 2000: what is Tom Dolan up to? Now for the uneducated, Tom Dolan is an amazing Olympic swimmer who went to the University of Michigan. He won gold in 1996 in the 400 meter and then won gold again in 2000 in the 400 meter and a silver medal in the 200 meter. He broke many records and drew a lot of attention due to his tall lanky frame, University of Michigan hip tattoo and the fact that he battled asthma, chronic fatigue, and lung viruses and still persevered. Basically, he was my childhood Olympic crush and I loved him. Sure other famous Olympic swimmers with big personalities have come and gone since (Gary Hall Jr, Ian Thorpe, Michael Phelps) but no one captured my loyalty like Tom Dolan. So I decided to google Tom Dolan to see what he is up to and learned the following things (assuming these links had correct up-to-date information):

-He is 6'6" tall and at his heyday had 3% body fat.
-He worked as a sales trader at an investment bank in DC after college.
-He was inducted into the International Swimming Hall of Fame (ISHOF) in2006.
-He is working with Carlile Swimming in Australia to help bring their swim school model to the US.
-I still love Tom Dolan.

So for all the Tom Dolan fans out there, feel free to reminisce about our golden boy and be comforted by the fact that it sounds like he is doing well and isn't some drug addict who can't hold onto a steady job and tries to pick up women at a bar with the line "hey, I was once on a Wheaties box."



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Dolan

http://sports.jrank.org/pages/1221/Dolan-Tom-Olympic-Champion.html

http://bigten.cstv.com/sports/m-swim/spec-rel/072408aaa.html

http://www.swimnews.com/News/displayStory.jhtml?id=5879

Carebears Placed on Nutrasystem, Given volume express mascara

So my sissy sent me the following article which discusses how beloved childhood characters from the past are being given up-to-date, modern makeovers to make them more relevant for children today. In addition to Strawberry Shortcake's tween makeover and giving the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles steroids, American Greetings will soon be creating Carebears with less belly fat and longer eyelashes. Admittedly, Strawberry Shortcake looks outdated (I think she evens wears a pinafore). However, the Carebears are bears and do need fat in order to hibernate in the winter so I think it would be fine for them to stay lovably chubby. Also, who cares about a bear's eyelashes? No one looks at Knut, the famed German polar bear and goes "aww, look at those lashes!" My one friend joked that with this trend, soon we will see that "the Glow Worms have switched to environmentally friendly LED lights"!

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/11/business/media/11cartoons.html?ex=1213848000&en=71fdb51074cf6500&ei=5070&emc=eta1

One of the highlights of the article included this description of a past makeover that fell flat on its face: Gay Ken.

Reinventing these beloved characters without inflicting indelible damage is one of the entertainment industry’s trickiest maneuvers. Go too far, as Mattel did in 1993 when it gave Ken a purple mesh T-shirt, a pierced ear and the name “Earring Magic Ken,” and it can set off a brand crisis on a global scale.

This is awesome. I need to find and purchase this doll. It's nice to know that Mattel interpreted that look to be trendy in 1993. And here I thought it was more grunge with plaid shirts and ripped jeans.

My Worst Nightmare

The "New York Times" recently featured a couple who are never more than 15 feet apart from each other. They eat off the same plate, read the same books, sleep in the same quarters with no electricity or running water, and they even breathe in the same pattern. When one has to go to the bathroom, the other waits outside. Or in this case, when Christine McNally has to pee in the woods, Michael Roach turns away and steps aside far enough to be away from the stream of urine. This is a celibate partnership and high level Buddhist practice to help you get in touch with your emotions and faults, etc. But frankly, this just conjures up nightmares to me. Having someone (even if it's a loved one) follow you around all day long? No privacy whatsoever? That is scarier thought than being trapped in solitary in prison.

Here's the article:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/15/garden/15buddhists.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

Here's a more realistic portrayal of what happens when regular folks attempt this:

http://www.slate.com/id/2192282/?GT1=38001

TV Guide Shocker Indeed

TV Guide just released some shocking news and it's not even about a television show. TV Guide's official scoop-master/ resident egomaniac, Michael Ausiello is leaving to go work for Entertainment Weekly. WTF!!???!!

I'm distressed somewhat by this news. I used to be a big fan of Ausiello. I laughed at his jokes, read his spoilers religiously, contemplated sending him Snapple, and once went to a TV Guide holiday party with the hopes that I might run into the man. His job was a dream job to me, his loves (Lauren Graham, etc) were my loves. But somewhere along the line, the love went sour. I would probably pinpoint it to about 1, 1 1/2 years ago when I found myself truly tiring of his schtick. His columns seemed to revolve more around praise and insults directed at him rather than the TV show gossip that I was looking for. If you only have so much space to answer questions, why would you clog up essential room with comments from readers declaring their affection for this pseudo-celebrity. In fact, it seems like Michael Ausiello has been working very hard recently to cultivate this image of himself as a legitimate celebrity (pushing for votes for sexiest vegetarian and so on). Of course, there are famous writers and I certainly even have my favorite magazine writers, but Ausiello was just so shameless and self-indulgent that he crossed over from lovable minx to annoying pixie in a very short span of time. And now to hear that he is moving over to my favorite entertainment magazine on the planet? Oh, it's just dreadful. Perhaps EW will reign in the ego as their focus is more on the material and digging deeper into entertainment stories rather than throwing in a lot of silly jokes and cheap spoilers to make up for substance. All I can say is, Michael Ausiello, you are no Dalton Ross. You are no Ken Tucker. And you sure as hell are no Mark Harris. However, you are still superior to Scott Brown (god he annoys me). So reign in your Smurf love and your ego stroking and stick to entertaining readers with substance and not fluff. I'm hoping that this is a great growth opportunity and will allow you to put more journalistic ambition into your articles. However, if I start reading about your partner's stationary line in the pages of EW, I will seriously consider cancelling my subscription.

Article:

http://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-News-Blog/Todays-News/Ausiello-Exit-Shocker/800040484

MTV Guide has a new frenemy: Michael Ausiello is joining Entertainment Weekly, after eight fantastic years as our resident scooper. "Michael has been a great reporter and a great friend," says TVGuide.com editor-in-chief Christy Tanner. "We wish him the best, and promise that we won’t miss a beat delivering all the great scoop you’re used to on TVGuide.com."

Hello Kitty-chan! Kawaii!!

I was informed by a reliable source that Hello Kitty was just named Japan's tourism ambassador (other goodwill ambassadors include PUFFY AMIYUMI AHHH!!!!!). This is pretty adorable as is the picture in the article even if I do prefer my Kitty to be tiny rather than life sized. But why does Hello Kitty reside in London? I feel like London is too stuffy for this feisty feline.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080519/ap_on_fe_st/japan_hello_kitty

Miley Cyrus Picturegate 2008

Everyone is freaking out over Miley Cyrus's "racy" pictures, most recently in a "Vanity Fair" spread. I've seen a couple of the shots and the main cover is not bad in my opinion. OMG news at 11, Miley Cyrus has a back! The more offensive picture is Miley with her daddy, achy breaky heart and mullet aficionado Billy Ray. Miley is showing midriff and draped across her dad and the overall effect is creepy and vaguely sexual. I don't care if you want to lie on your teenage boyfriend's lap or share candy with your slutty looking friend or expose your lime green bra to the public Miley. But a little bit of career advice for you: don't pose in pictures where you look like lovers with your father!!! It weirds people out!

If for some reason, you are really interested in Miley's photo shoot with "Vanity Fair," here is a slideshow.

http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/features/2008/06/miley_slideshow200806

9021-Ho: Shenae Grimes join the 90210 spin-off

I kid, I kid. I'm a huge "Degrassi: The Next Generation" fan. How is it that Canadians go there so much better than the rest of us?

It was just announced that Shenae Grimes of Degrassi will be joining the 90210 spin-off playing Lori Loughlin's (Aunt Becky) wholesome teenage daughter who moves to Beverly Hills. It was the role that was rumored to belong to Hilary Duff and is also probably the Brenda Walsh role back when Aaron Spelling cared about Brenda being remotely likable.

http://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-Editors-Blog/Ausiello-Report/Ausiello-Scoop-Shenae/800038498

For those of you unfamiliar with the genius that is Degrassi, Shenae (you gotta love a white girl named Shenae!) plays/played Darcy, the super-religious cheerleader who gets herself into sticky situations. Now these sticky situations go beyond finding "the perfect cheer." Our girl Darcy took racy pictures and posted them online and some creepy old dude came to her house. Then she went on a ski trip where she got drugged, raped, and may have gotten an STD? She hid what happened from mostly everyone and also attempted suicide (or at least considered it). She then tried to hit on her teacher who she had confided the truth about her situation to, then subsequently got him suspended when he tried to get her to talk to her parents about her issues. In a rage, she chopped off a clump of her hair. Eventually, she cleared the teacher but I'm not sure if she ever told her parents the truth (I missed quite a few episodes the last season). Darcy is not my favorite Degrassi character, but I think Shenae is pretty and a decent actress so this is a good opportunity for her. She resembles Lori Loughlin and I think I'd rather see break through to the masses in the U.S. than that annoying chubby girl who plays Paige on Degrassi (who was featured in that Antonio Banderas dance movie). I still won't watch the 90210 spin-off though because I'm really way too old to watch such drivel. As is, I can only comfort myself with the knowledge that I am Degrassi fan because it's "foreign". And umm, I only watch "Gossip Girl" for the scenes of NYC.

Mentiroso Mentiroso Pantalones en Fuego?

So if you are like me, you have probably read a few Augusten Burroughs "memoirs." I started out with "Dry" one summer because the Monmouth County library was out of my first choice, the far more famous, career making book "Running with Scissors." "Dry" was fine but I was always peeved at the fact that in reviews or book blurbs, people kept comparing Burroughs to David Sedaris. Let's be frank, that is outrageous. Burroughs is nowhere near as funny or clever or charming as David Sedaris (plus I think it's pretty much clear in Sedaris's work that he is a flagrant exaggerator). "Dry" revolved around Burroughs' plummet into the bowels of addiction with his alcoholism tanking his lucrative advertising career as well as his ability to entertain in the home (I seem to recall his apartment was flooded with red wine bottles and he went to a meeting with fancy jewelry company clients with the scent of booze coming out of his pores. Cue Summer Roberts "umm ew"). "Dry" had a few amusing observations and passages, but overall was just a decent read. There is something about Burroughs' style and stories that seem very manufactured and false. This was further confirmed when I finally read "Running with Scissors." I didn't get the hype with this book. It had more humor than "Dry" but even more so I felt somewhat deceived. Burroughs is so detailed and precise and his life is so unbelievable that.......I just don't believe it. Of course, you need to take every memoir with a grain of salt. Details are fudged, memory fails, stories are subject to your interpretation of events. No one goes around with a video camera and a tape recorder 24/7 in the hopes of one day writing a precise memoir. However, with all the recent attention heaped upon James Frey and Margaret Seltzer, people are scrutinizing memoirs and viewing them with more distrust than ever before. These are sort of thorny issues. What is the line between exaggeration and misrepresentation of facts? Is it when living people are falsely portrayed? Is it mixing up names and dates and places?

When I heard that Burroughs is coming out with a new book focused on his harsh and oftentimes difficult relationship with his absentee father, I felt these old feelings of annoyance rise to the surface once again. While before, I was not too keen on his style and not that interested in anything he had to say about his life, I now felt as though I wanted to see him exposed. Sure, there was that "Vanity Fair" expose in 2007 that shed light on the lawsuit brought against Burroughs by the family that is featured in "Running with Scissors", but I needed more. Burroughs denies fictionalizing or sensationalizing his memoirs despite the fact that he must now call them "books". These denials are what perturb me. Yesterday, NYMag arrived and the headline said something to effect of "Augusten Burroughs get the Polygraph Treatment". Now, yes maybe I'm too literal a person, but I thought for a minute the man was finally undergoing a polygraph test. I'm not a proponent of the polygraph typically. There is a reason why results are inadmissible in court and you can certainly pass/fail questions due to nerves or skill, so they aren't scientifically foolproof. However, I thought it would be very juicy indeed to pin Burroughs down. Unfortunately, it's just the writer of the article's internal polygraph that fluctuates throughout the article. Blah! Can anyone make this man take a polygraph?!? Can we get some crossover promotion with St. Martin's Press and "Moment of Truth"?

What do you all think about Augusten Burroughs? Are you guys fans? Do you think he's a liar? Does it matter?

Sweet Valley High: Version 2.0

So I read today that Random House is updating the classic teen girl series "Sweet Valley High." Admission: I loved loved loved the SVH books when I was growing up. I started reading them when I was about 7 or 8 and I kept reading them embarrassingly until I was probably 17 years old (relax people, I also read real books too). I like the idea of twins who were so close yet different: scheming Jessica and goody two shoes Elizabeth. Even though they had different interests and personalities, they were always there to help each other out and pretend to be the other one in a crisis. It was like that Amy Adams/Kristen Wiig SNL skit except the Wakefield's schemes actually worked.... and one of the twins didn't get fat in high school. They had a lot of frivolous stories (Jessica gives the family food poisoning when she pries open shellfish! Someone starts a rumor in the slam books! Jessica gets sabotaged at a beauty pagent!) but some were serious (Deaf Regina Morrow dying of a drug overdose her first time trying coke.). So even though they were not necessarily "quality" books for children, I have fond memories of them.

Now for those of you who aren't familiar with the Wakefield twins, these are their distinguishing characteristics.

Jessica-5'6", dimple on cheek, CA tan, "perfect size 6", wears gold laverie necklace which was a gift from her parents, drives a red fiat, not great in school, loves to perform, is boy crazy, best friend is Lila Fowler

Elizabeth-5'6", dimple on cheek, CA tan, "perfect size 6", wears gold laverie necklace which was a gift from her parents, drives a red fiat, smart and serious, writes for the school paper, boyfriend is Todd Wilkins (with a brief stint with Jeffrey...French was it?), best friend is Enid "I used to be wild but now I'm a bore" last name unimportant

Now, please note the "perfect size 6" in quotation marks. That isn't my opinion, it was the writers of SVH and the time period I suppose. But with this new update (you can't even call it a re imagining b/c it sounds like the details changed are minor and silly), the twins are now a "perfect size 4" and drive a jeep and have a blog.

Come on! Are you telling me some 14 yr old girl who picks up a SVH book today and reads the words Fiat, suddenly says, "This book is like sooo unrealistic. Who drives a Fiat anymore? I need to get me some 'Gossip Girls' books instead. They have monkeys and bisexuality!"

Plus why is Levin Rambin the cover girl? She plays twins on AMC and now she is portraying the Sweet Valley twins? Couldn't they hire real twins? Wouldn't that save time and photoshop edits? I like Levin the actress actually and she is a legitimate teen but I feel like she's an odd choice to be Elizabeth and Jessica.

Here is the article that caught my eye:

http://gawker.com/5004617/random-house-proudly-promoting-eating-d

The comments are hilarious though:

While we're at it, can we get Social Services to help The Boxcar Children?

since she now works on the school website and not the school newspaper will SVH be available in a podcast or for download online??

In the 2008 version, The Baby-Sitters Club becomes a covert name for a high-priced prostitution ring, including members "Kristy," "Mallory," "Stacy" and sweet "Mary Anne."

-Coo coo note: I have always imagined a Baby-Sitters Club update to be more like this: Kristy goes the "L Word" route, Claudia is hiding marijuana in her hollowed out Nancy Drew book, Mallory's mother commits suicide after having 10 children and leave Mallory to raise them, Stacy not only is diabetic but also has ADD, Dawn embarks on a torrid affair with a young teacher, and Mary Anne finds out her beloved dead mother was having an affair with Kristy's dad around the time she was born.

Note: Do not, I repeat do not confuse "Sweet Valley High" with "Sweet Valley Twins." Twins is based on their lives in middle school which were even too boring for me when I was in elementary school. I thought the Unicorn Club was cheesy and I wanted the books to be more scandalous, thus my love of SVH. Don't even get me started on "Sweet Valley Kids" when they were in second grade.

Robert Downey Jr. in blackface?

And it actually doesn't sound horribly offense!

http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20182058,00.html

Discuss.

Arrrrgg Men!

Due to illnesss and work load, Coo Coo has been busy. No one is immune from the flu/bronchitis. However, we were compelled to speak out on a very important matter. No, not the primary results but tonight's "Life of Ryan" episode. Ryan has been bitching about finding a girlfriend for 2 years. He finally finds one and Kayla seems like a sweet girl (we finally got over the bleached blonde hair and heavy eyeliner). But tonight, Ryan turns 18 and suddenly has no time for a girlfriend. Admittedly, he probably doesn't as he is busy with his career and friends and so on. However, we really believed in his quest for love and he just came across as such a ...... a.......man tonight. ARRGG! Kayla just bought him a $250 dollar Gucci wallet for Christmas (did Ryan google the price or did Kayla leave the price tag on?), wanted to meet his dad, and helped plan his surprise birthday party. Okay, maybe our gal came on a bit strong with all the talk about feelings and insisting on meeting the parents, but still, she was such a nice girl and really liked him. It made us want to throw a book at Ryan's Redbull clad head (enough with product placement by the way, it's just becoming too in your face). So Coo Coo Bananas is now on team Kayla. We encourage her to engage in other girl relationship cliches now that they have broken up. Cut your hair short! Eat a pint of ice cream! Call Ryan's home phone and hang up! Throw cans of Red Bull in Ryan's yard! Start dating Tony! Girl power!

Election '08

Questions to ponder while Coo Coo does work:

1) Does Obama not pay enough attention to Hispanic voters? Will this be his downfall?

2) What is the deal with American Samoa?

3) Should Obama agree to weekly debates with Hillary? Even though it's partly b/c Hil needs the publicity b/c she doesn't have as much money as Obama?

4) Why does John McCain's wife feel so cold to me? And no, it's not the prescription drug addiction.

5) Does Hillary own a closet full of smart red pantsuits much like Superman or Spiderman has a closet full of costumes?

6) Why doesn't anyone concentrate on Asian voters? Do we not vote? Or we inconsequential?

7) Why is Ron Paul still in this race? More importantly, why was one man campaigning for himself outside the NJ Path station last night? Did he lose a bet?

I love this site

http://www.someecards.com/

These cards have quaint, old-fashioned imagery and then just ridiculous sayings on them.

Happy Super Fat Tuesday!

Last night, the late night shows were on fire. First, Hillary was on Letterman (but not Eli, he was stuck in the airport) and she was super charming. She was warm, benevolent, glowing, and graceful. This is the Hillary we have been waiting for.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2vMhXOUEtI

Then, Conan took his feud with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert to the next level by having a knock down, drag out fight about who "made" Mike Huckabee. It was complete with broken bottles, falling down stairs, and a special video appearance by Mike Huckabee.

Apparently, it was part of a whole night event which I only caught the tail end of. Here are some videos and commentary on it.

http://www.tvsquad.com/2008/02/05/the-obrien-vs-stewart-vs-colbert-three-show-throwdown-video/

http://www.nbc.com/Late_Night_with_Conan_O'Brien/video/episodes.shtml

Moo-riah

First of all, I don't think Mariah Carey is fat at all. But I do think her press nickname is funny. Mariah makes me laugh with her diva antics and the way she exercises in high heels and is dripping in diamonds at all times even when skiing. I read this today about how Mariah doesn't want to get ugly for her current movie role b/c she is insecure about her appearance. Now this is the role that Janet Jackson supposedly got fat for. And I always wondered what that was supposed to mean. Think about it: Janet Jackson gained like 60 lbs for a movie role and then they just gave it to Mimi? And all they want Mariah to do is wear a fake nose and some extra hair and she won't budge? This is very fishy. Why would Janet need to gain the weight and not Mariah? Mariah should take her cues from Al Lambert from "Step by Step" (Christine Lakin I think?) who is the "Nottie" in Paris Hilton's new straight to DVD to trash film "The Hottie and the Nottie." I mean they had to make her look REALLY bad to try to get Paris to look decent.

http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/02/05/2008-02-05_mariah_careys_role_in_tennessee_it_could.html

What is Obama's health care plan?

Hillary's comments have me concerned. What exactly is Obama's stance on universal healthcare? Who knows? Should I be regretting my primary vote already?

http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/02/03/clinton-lays-out-differences-with-obama/

October Road-Defender of the Homely

I was reading "Ask Matt" on TVguide.com this morning and came upon this question which was quite humorous. I have bolded my favorite part.

Question: I agree with you that October Road is poorly written. No one is going to deny that. But did Grey's Anatomy ever get knocked for its bomb fiascos and endless love triangles? While people do complain about Grey's, it can't even compare to the amount of grief given to October Road, which may have poor writing, but which portrays homeliness and neighborly feeling in a remarkably warm light. The characters may be plain, but they're your best friends from high school. Whereas McSteamy is just plain Superman with an addiction to sex (like we've never heard that one before). I personally believe that all TV has its cheese. Leave the edge and the realism to full feature films.— Laura

Now, Matt's answer is irrelevant. But basically, he says "October Road" sucks and is on the low end of guilty pleasure.

But who tries to defend a show by admitting it's written poorly but is a positive example b/c it employs homely actors? Lol, I mean that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever read. That's like saying "Rock of Love" is trashy and low class but at least provides a showcase for extremely unattractive and cheap women. Finally, an advocate for French trannies everywhere!! And also, if I were Laura Preppon, that dude from "One Tree Hill"and that Uma Thurman movie, and that Stults guy from "7th Heaven" (these guys are not even worth imdb-ing their names for confirmation), I would be insulted. I realize that Laura is not referring to them as the homely ones but still, they are the stars of this haven for the homely.

Note: Is it possible that she means "homey-ness" instead (or whatever is the accurate version of that word). Is she simply trying to say that "October Road" makes you feel cozy and warm and keeps it real? Is this a case of the misplaced "l"?

Joyce Chen-What are you doing?

I was perusing the A&P ads today during work deciding what groceries to purchase this week. And I stumbled upon this item on your left.

"Joyce Chen Ravioli"?!!?? What??!! Shouldn't it be "Joyce Chen Dumplings"? I can't really see the picture too well but based on the fillings which consist of either chicken & vegetables or pork & vegetables, I would assume this item is more akin to dumplings than ravioli. Plus I don't think a woman with the name of "Joyce Chen" would be touting her ravioli skills to America. Initially, I felt annoyed. I think the American public is aware of what dumplings are and there's no need to compare it to a more popular mainstream dish that people are familiar with. These aren't "Chinese Tamales" here (which frankly are really difficult to explain so I'm not even going to try). So I thought to myself, let me look up this Joyce Chen person.

Apparently, she was a Chinese chef, restauranteur, and entrepeneur. She had restaurants, cookbooks, and sold other products under her name. Chen is credited with popularizing the Mandarin style of Chinese cooking in the U.S. Her focus was making Chinese food accessible to the American public. She actually called dumplings or potstickers "ravioli" because her first restaurant was in a predominantly Italian area. Also, please keep in mind that Chen was alive from 1917-1994 so these were different times when she was starting out. Apparently, Chinese restaurants in the greater Boston, MA area still call dumplings "Peking Ravioli" or "ravs". So now that I know the history, I can accept the usage of ravioli for dumplings. It's clearly part of the Joyce Chen legecy and a nod to her history. However, I really hope people in Boston aren't really saying "ravs" still because that type of colloquialism would probably annoy me if I heard it.

Is this not the most gorgeous woman?

I love Cate Blanchett. So classy, so regal, so talented!

Photo courtesy of EW-Alan Gelati/Corbis Outline.

Kanye West's Tour

This looks awesome!

Bye bye John

"In this race where you've got an African American, a woman, and......uh......John...." (laughter)
~Barack Obama

Well we can take out John Edwards now it looks like:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080130/ap_on_el_pr/edwards

Oprah vs Angelou

Coo Coo has been silent these past few days out of respect for Heath Ledger and will not comment on his death until the autopsy is conclusive.

But we saw this tidbit today and had to resurface for commentary.

Adding more confusion to Election '08, Maya Angelous has come out in support of Hillary. Angelous said, “I know what kind of president Hillary Clinton will be because I know who she is. Hillary Clinton has always been a strong woman and a passionate protector of families. For 35 years, that’s exactly what she has been doing. Each generation of African Americans stands on the shoulders of those who came before. Today, the challenges facing us threaten the dreams we have had for our children. We need a president with the experience and strength to meet those challenges. I am inspired by Hillary Clinton’s commitment and courage — a daughter, a wife, a mother — my girl.”

My question is this, were there heated debates at dinner parties between Oprah and Maya? After all, Mama O loves Maya Angelous and vice versa. Will this cause a rift in an otherwise otherworldly spirtual connection? Where does Gayle King stand in all this? Don't tell me she's for Edwards?!?

Tom Brady: Injured?

Tom Brady was spotted wearing a walking boot and limping the other night in NYC. Superfans and reporters are fretting over the injury. Brady says he'll still be in the Super Bowl and I could care less about the Patriots. I'd rather speculate over how he got the injury. My theory: Giselle Bunchen beats him! I smell abusive relationship people!

The evidence:

Brady was spotted carrying some lovely flowers for Giselle on the night in question. I don't buy that he was just being sweet. The man is an absentee father, he's not sweet. Perhaps they were make up flowers so her temper would cool or flowers to show he's whipped both literally and figuratively?

He wore the walking boot to Butter. Who wears such a thing to a place where there is dancing? He should be staying home and resting his injury. Unless his dominating partner demanded he go out partying and dancing or she'll break the ankle for real this time!!!

I'm kidding of course. Giselle seems like a very nice lady and would probably never beat a big, strong and tough man like Tom Brady... unless he really deserved it.

Fred Thompson drops out, his 3 fans mourn

Fred Thompson has taken his name out of the ring for the Republican presidential race. He was half assing his campaign all along so I'm not even sure what his point was. He can comfort himself knowing that he may be able to guest star on future Law & Order episodes and still go home to his hot wife.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080122/ap_on_el_pr/thompson

Age Inappropriate Crushes

I think now and then everyone gets them. It of course isn't so bad if you are 21 and like a 17 year old celebrity but it veers into uncomfortable territory the older you get. These crushes can vary between just wanting to hang out with the person to saying "If I was that age, I would date so and so" to the downright creepy love/lust that border on pedophile alert (I'm talking to you Hayden Panettiere fans). I will say right now my age inappropriate crushes are probably more the "If I were younger..." variety. With that, I present you with my age inappropriate crush, Ryan Sheckler. Ryan stars on the show "Life of Ryan" on MTV and he's a professional skate boarder. The kid is really down to earth for someone so famous and he seems like a genuinely nice and responsible 17 year old. Which is downright refreshing to see on a network like MTV.

Pros:

-He can afford to buy his own house at 17 (but ended up not to spend time with his brothers).

-He seems genuinely kind and considerate.

-He is loyal to his friends.

-He is family oriented. Much of his show revolves around Ryan trying to be there for his little brothers and his divorced parents.

-He doesn't want to date women who are only interested in him b/c he's famous.

-He's very driven and talented at what he does.

-He has a new shorter haircut that is quite fetching.

-Skate boarders are cool.

-He cries on national television without shame.

Cons:

-He has a penchant for cheap looking blondes who have just broken up with their boyfriends.

-He wears really big diamond studs on his ears.

A is for Apple and Adorable

Little Apple Martin is getting really cute! Photo courtesy of X17Online.com.

Baby McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey is having a baby with his (24 year old model!) girlfriend, Camila Alves. She's about three months along.

Does anyone else think the McConaughey offspring will be running around naked in the back yard, fertilizing the lawn?

http://movies.msn.com/movies/article.aspx?news=292957&GT1=7701

There Will Be Blood (Spoilerish)

Who thinks Paul and Eli are the same person despite references in the movie to Paul being a separate brother and PTA's casting of 2 different actors? Anyone? I am just not convinced that Paul and Eli are two different people.

Movie adaptation of "The Road"

Charlize Theron will be joining Viggo Mortensen in the movie adaptation of Cormac McCarthy's "The Road." I really don't like the idea of making a movie out of the book. I think the book is beautiful and sparse and I don't want to see it translated onto the screen. And how much are they going to show? Are they going to show dead baby carcass roasted on a spit? Or maybe a dirty, skinny naked boy bathing for the first time in weeks? I don't know; this idea vexes me.

http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20171763,00.html

The plague has returned!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080115/sc_nm/plague_threat_dc

French Scandal

French President Nicolas Sarkozy supposedly married model/singer Carla Bruni last week. This has caused quite a stir in France where they find such behavior unbecoming of a president and find Carla Bruni to be distasteful. Carla has been with famous men such as Kevin Coster, Donald Trump, and Mick Jagger. She was also with this French guy and then had an affair with his married son. They ultimately had a baby together. Bruni has also been quoted saying that she's not into monogamy. She seems like quite a... catch. Good luck with that Sarkozy, be sure to keep her away from your sons Pierre and Jean! At least Bruni seems less crazy than other models of a certain age such as Janice Dickenson.

You know your workplace has become too casual when...

You are trying to figure out what to wear to work and you contemplate your black yoga/casual sleep pants.

Rock of Love 2

I absolutely positively refuse to DVR this show but I did catch some last night. I wasn't going to watch but then I noticed something very interesting. Megan, the season 3 winner of "Beauty and the Geek" is a contestant. She looks much better. Did she use her winnings to get plastic surgery? More importantly, is she a reality fame whore? Finally, didn't her geek teach her better than this?

List of Celeb Contributions to Political Candidates

I cut and paste this from Perez who cut and paste it from... some other source.

It's pretty interesting. Ellen Pompeo gives more than Oprah!

Jennifer Aniston–$2,300 to Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama
Tyra Banks–$2,300 contribution to Obama
Halle Berry–$2,300 to Obama
Zach Braff–$2,300 to Obama
Christie Brinkley–$2,150 to Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton–$1,000 to Obama
Jerry Bruckheimer–$2,300 to Republican presidential candidate John McCain
Cher–$2,100 to former Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden
George Clooney–$2,300 to Obama
Michael Douglas–$4,600 to Clinton–$4,600 to Richardson–$1,500 to Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich–$4,600 to Dodd–$4,600 to Obama
Jamie Foxx–$2,300 to Obama
Kelsey Grammer–$2,300 to Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani
Tom Hanks–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Obama
Val Kilmer–$2,300 to Richardson
Tobey Maguire–$4,600 to Clinton–$2,300 to Obama
Steve Martin–$2,300 to Dodd
Lorne Michaels–$4,600 to Dodd–$2,300 to McCain
Bette Midler–$4,600 to Richardson–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Obama
Eddie Murphy–$2,300 to Obama
Paul Newman–$4,600 to Obama–$4,600 to Clinton–$2,300 to Richardson–$4,600 to Dodd
Edward Norton–$2,300 to Obama
Rosie O'Donnell–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Obama–$2,300 to Richardson–$2,300 to Edwards
Sean Penn–$2,300 to Kucinich–$4,600 to Edwards
Ellen Pompeo–$4,600 to Obama
Lynn Redgrave–$250 to Clinton
Rob Reiner–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Richardson–$2,300 to Edwards–$1,000 to Dodd
Chris Rock–$4,600 to Obama
Adam Sandler–$2,100 to Giuliani
Brooke Shields–$2,300 to Obama
Will Smith–$4,600 to Obama
Steven Spielberg–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Richardson–$2,300 to Edwards–$2,300 to Obama
Ben Stein–$750 to Giuliani
Ben Stiller–$2,300 to Edwards–$2,300 to Obama–$4,600 to Clinton
Barbra Streisand–$1,000 to Dodd–$2,300 to Clinton–$2,300 to Edwards–$2,300 to Obama
Oprah Winfrey–$2,300 to Obama
Renee Zellweger–$4,600 to Clinton

We're rich bitch!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/ap_most_millionaires

This is no armpit of America!

We just love this guy!

Zac Efron is a Queen

This kid is hilarious. For proof see Q8 in an interview with Seventeen Magazine.

8. If you could trade places with anyone in the world for one day, who would it be?
Queen of England. Why? No idea.

http://www.seventeen.com/dating/17-questions/

Caucuses are weird

So it's 2008 and I'm sure everyone has election fever. Well I do at least. Last night was the first round of a long process which will narrow down the candidates who will inevitably run for President. I must say though, what is the deal with the Iowa Caucus? Why Iowa? I know there's some historical precident for this but I'm not sure it makes sense to place so much emphasis on a state that is not really representative of how the rest of the country thinks (Nothing against Iowa but all those evangelicals voting for Huckabee aren't necessarily what America thinks. Also, does anyone know if Mike has campaign shirts that say "I heart Huckabee"? B/c that would be cute altho I don't know if he would be into name checking a sucky movie about existentialism. That's right, I think that movie was a time suck and not enjoyable!!!! However, I will say Mark Walberg is funnier than I thought. But I digress...).

Last night, I came to the realization that the caucus system is truly bizarre albeit fascinating. I think I speak for many of you when I say that I was a tad confused about the difference between a caucus and a primary. Well to the extent of my knowledge, a primary is more formal and straightforward. Voters simply cast their ballot for a particular candidate. A caucus is more like a big town meeting where people hear speeches and discuss before voting for a candidate. It is less cloak and dagger and more public. Now that sounds quaint and charming to me but I don't know if I like the caucus system. I mean people are gathering in people's living rooms? That just seems so informal to me! I also don't like the influence and pressure tactics that can be used to impact voting. And some regions might only have like 3 people in the caucus. That seems like unfair weighting to me. The Democrats use a different system than the Republicans. I feel like if we are putting this much emphasis on a caucus, shouldn't methodology be consistent? The Republicans are more straight-forward: people vote and the winner is declared. For the Dems, votes are compiled and then people go into a room where representatives are standing in different areas to indicate each candidate. You then go to stand by the candidate of your choice. However, your candidates must have received 15% of the vote in the first step of the caucus to qualify. As an example, let's say you were in a caucus of 10 people at Tom Sanderson's house. After waiting for Tom to get off of work as I'm assuming everyone must be in the same place at the same time (INEFFICIENT!), you vote. Chris Thompson voted for Biden. He was the only one. Thus, Biden did not receive 15% of the vote so for the second stage of the Democratic caucus, Chris Thompson must pick another candidate to support. Chris loved Bill Clinton but hates Hillary, he wants someone less divisive, someone more palatable as a second choice. Chris decides to go with Obama. Therefore, Obama gets the vote and the original vote for Biden is not reported on. The Dems system cuts out the fat so to speak, letting the bigger dogs shine. But still very odd, n'cest pas?

I was excited that Obama won but I must say I was surprised by how well Edwards did. His crowd turnout in Iowa was much smaller than Obama and Clinton and his funds are also comparatively smaller. This is a tough year for me in terms of candidates. My heart says Obama but my head says "Are you sure?" I do like Hillary's experience and brains and her naked ambition. She's such a power hungry bitch and I actually mean that as a compliment. But people hate Hillary. There's really no middle ground on her whereas people just love Obama and his inspirational messages of hope. But sometimes he seems so naive to me. Edwards is fine but I certainly like Elizabeth more than I like him. I also feel like he should be concentrating on his family right now and not taking them all around the country to indulge his dreams. By the way, check out the video at the NYtimes where they talk about how hard life is on the road for young children and Edwards tells his little moppet son Jack that the reporters who set up basketball games for him, etc are not his friends. I thought that was so mean! That and a lackluster interview on Logo earlier in the year make me eh on Edwards. He can be in the cabinet but he's not ready for the big chair yet.

*Note: I'm just a regular Jane so forgive me if my knowledge of political facts are off.

Funny b/c it's true

This bit was from thesuperficial.com:

Kristen Bell has been trying to keep her relationship with Dax Shepard out of the public eye. Some say it’s to maintain a sense of privacy. I say it’s out of shame, utter remorse and did I mention shame? Anyway, the two were spotted yesterday being very affectionate on South Beach. I don’t really see the appeal of Dax Shepard, but I guess chicks dig mediocre acting talent coupled with sub-par looks.

SO TRUE! Be ashamed Kristen Bell, you could do so much better. Hell, I'd rather she wind up with Milo. Too bad she's about 7 years too old for him.

I hate you, reality dating shows!!!

So Tila Tequilla is getting a second shot at love with MTV. It scored boffo ratings so in a way, this should come as no surprise. However, even though I know it's MTV which often mixes insincere intentions with shameless sluttery, I really wanted to believe in Tila's love. Initially, I heard there would be no second season b/c Tila found true love and happiness. I found that to be refreshing but now they say it was just a ploy to hold out for more money. This is very frustrating b/c you almost never find Asian women on TV so I wanted to support that whore Tila in her identity quest. But now I hear all these rumors that she has a longtime boyfriend, isn't bisexual, and didn't even give Bobby her phone number after she picked him. I mean what on earth! At least pretend like you are sort of interested before breaking up in time to announce the second season of your show. I didn't care one way or the other for Bobby (Team Dani!!) but I still feel bad for the guy b/c he seemed to genuinely care about Tila unless that was all a facade too!

There is a second season of "Rock of Love" as well. F you Bret Michaels, I'm so pissed off at him too. I mean obviously he wants nothing but a good time but that was one of the few times that I watched a really bad reality dating show on cable where a nice girl got picked. Jes was refreshingly normal and level headed and I was impressed that she was picked. Now I read that he only called her once in the 6 months after the show to invite her to come to one of his performances but he also invited 2 other "Rock of Love" alum as well. Jes said it was clear Bret wasn't interested but it was okay b/c she wasn't into him either. She was just exhausted from the mind games and being cooped up in the house all day. Jes also claims on VH1.com that she never had sex with Bret as does Heather interestingly enough. I was very surprised at this. What were they doing on their overnight dates then? I thought if I couldn't count on real romantic feelings and a foundation of respect and mutual admiration, I could at least depend on cheap, casual sex. Especially from a *cough* rock star. So if the hookups are fake and the love is fake, why do I keep wasting my time on this crap?!