Thursday, August 7, 2008

Will Kill for Fried Chicken


One of the Yahoo! news stories today involved a man who pleaded guilty to murder in exchange for fried chicken, calzones, and pizza. Apparently, this man was so sick of jail food that he was willing to go to prison with only a chance at parole after 30 years just for some outside food. As crazy as this story is, I'm more surprised at the fact that this man is from NYC which has an overabundance of quality, diverse cuisine and he sells himself out for KFC and Popeye's in Oregon. If I were going to make such a silly legal arrangement, I would at least negotiate for some foie gras, oysters, lobster, etc. - you know food that can't be found on a dollar menu. And I would insist that Chef Eric Ripert cook the food personally for me. And then have tea with me. And then whisper sweet nothings in my ear with his French accent.

I mean how bad was the food in prison? Even if it was Oliver Twist style gruel, as long as it didn't have pins in it, I wouldn't confess to murder over some bad food. Unless it was gruel with spam in it. That would prob make me confess. Maybe this criminal was listening to Nas's "Fried Chicken" song on a loop in jail and he felt the craving for "fried chicken, fly vixen, give me heart disease but I need you in my kitchen." Damn, that's a good song.

Here's the article on the criminal:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080807/ap_on_re_us/ice_cream_killer

Nas's "Fried Chicken":

http://www.amazon.com/Nas/dp/B001A5074S/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1218117382&sr=1-1

1 comment:

jubilena said...

That picture of fried chicken does look extra tasty....